34 Lessons For Life
My birthday is December 18th, and this year I’m turning 34. December is always a time of introspection and thought for me.
Holidays, birthday, new year to look forward to, old year to look back on.
So these are 34 random thoughts about life that I want to share. Maybe one, or a few help you. Take what you like, leave what you don’t. Enjoy 😊
There are no definite answers, and that’s frustrating because we want answers to our problems. There are a lot of helpful guidelines though, and sticking with best practices is ideal in most typical situations.
Everyone is struggling. The only thing with a 100% success rate is death.
The most important thing you can give yourself is grace.
Being selfish is selfless. Being selfless is often selfish.
The most important thing in life is connection and relationships. No one can do it alone.
Fitness is important insomuch as it improves your health. Once that stops being the case, it’s just another thing to be vain about and compare yourself to others. Don’t fall into that trap.
I’ve moved more in the last 18 months than I have In the first 33 years of my life. Nothing changes no matter where you go. If you aren’t happy here, you won’t be happy there. If you’re happy, you can bring that with you anywhere.
Just because nothing matters, doesn’t mean nothing matters. We are an abysmal speck in the grand scheme of the infinite universe and time. And yet, the small things like returning your grocery cart, being polite to the waiter or putting your phone down and listening to your kids and spouse with your full attention matter.
Learn to understand and embrace duality. Nothing is simply good or bad. Nothing is only one way. Even the things that make us happiest in life sometimes cause sadness. I love dogs. Every dog I have has made my life better and brought joy into my life. But on a cold snowy morning when I have to put on 3 layers and boots to take them out to pee, I still think “fuck this!”.
Humans are made for certain things. Being outside, getting sunlight, feeling nourished in your body, mind, and soul. Anything that moves you closer to those things is good. Anything that takes you farther from that should be looked at with a good amount of scrutiny.
Wanting is poison. Acceptance is the antidote. It might take your entire life to come to grips with it, but when you do, you will be free.
Ask more questions. Specifically “Why?”, “Why does this matter?” And “how do you know?”. Ask others, but more importantly, ask yourself.
Lucky 13. Luck is real. Luck is important. You can’t directly control luck (it wouldn’t be luck if you could!). But you can’t make your chances of getting lucky higher. The more at-bats you have, the better chance you have at getting a hit. Base hit, home run, or bunt, doesn’t matter. Keep swinging.
When in doubt, put your phone down, close your computer, and go outside.
Get comfortable with putting your phone on airplane mode. Leave It in the other room as often as possible.
“No” is a full sentence. “No thank you” is more polite. “Thank you, but no thank you” is the best answer for anything that isn’t in line with your values and vision.
Nothing is worth sacrificing your health. Hard stop. Full sentence. Yes, that includes money and your job.
Money is important insomuch as it is necessary to live in our society. The more you can detach yourself from unnecessary spending, the easier your life will become
Most spending is unnecessary. Understanding need vs want vs would be nice to have vs must have. Look at where your spending goes proportionately, and how much it is going to the former vs the latter
If it were easy, you’d have done it already.
Understand what you’re getting yourself into. Most people fail and quit because of unrealistic expectations that they never should have had out of the gate.
The magic is the middle ground.
Trust your intuition. Your body will seldom lead you wrong.
Skills worth investing in: learning how to exercise properly, understanding calories and nutrition science, and learning how to make money through a hobby you enjoy.
Everything is an investment. Everything costs. You either pay with time, or you pay with money. There’s no such thing as a free lunch.
Simple is smooth. Smooth is sustainable.
What doesn’t bend will break. The best-laid plans fall apart exactly because they are the best-laid plans. You gotta give it room to breathe.
Find hobbies that are physically active. Staying in good health (and shape) is much simpler when your hobbies are things like riding bikes, hiking, climbing, yoga with friends. If the only thing you do socially is eat and drink, you’re in for a rude awakening eventually.
Most things feel important in the moment. That’s because it’s too recent, and you’re too close. Give it time, and ask yourself how someone who isn’t involved would see the situation from a 3rd party view. It changes a lot.
The most powerful factors affecting your life that you don’t realize are the people and things around you. Where you hang out, and who you hang out with, directly affects every aspect of your life. Choose wisely.
It’s okay to struggle. It being hard is not a flaw in the system, it’s a necessary ingredient.
Choose your words wisely. If you say “I’m just lazy,” that becomes the narrative and the story that repeats. Don’t sell yourself short. “I’m just not in a place to prioritize that right now” is probably more truthful, and it leaves space for the story to change down the road. I’ve never seen someone who identifies as “lazy” suddenly become an ultra-marathoner out of the blue.
A little doesn’t matter, but a lot does. And a little becomes a lot more quickly than you’d think when you aren’t paying attention (so pay attention).
You are loved. I know because I love you. Share this with a friend if you love them too ❤️